You will always be my baby...

Pumpkin, you will always be my baby. You are away from me and with non-family for one of the first times. You started your summer camp this morning. You kept going between nervous and excited all week. Some moments you would ask if summer camp was open yet and then you would ask me to never leave you. I don't think you know how much you both melted and broke my heart in those moments. Daddy took today off so he could take you with me and we will hopefully take you to lunch after you are done. I know it is just three hours a day once a week, but it is a big step for you. This is your first real adventure in being a "big kid". We chose a place for you that you knew so well, you have taken classes there for 2 years. We got there and you said hi and then proceeded to sit on my lap until it was time to play. As soon as it was time to go into the gym, you gave Daddy and I a quick kiss and ran off with the kids. We stood there for a few minutes watching you play. Finally the teacher who knows us well told us "We have your cell phone numbers, you can go now". I think she realized we needed a little push to get out the door and leave you. This is what you need. Your brain needs more stimulation, your social butterfly nature needs more friends. This will just help prepare you for preschool in September. I just can not believe you are three and a half and at summer camp. You are always going to be my baby. I had to post pictures from the other day since you responded with this when I asked you if I could take your picture this morning "Not now Mommy, I think we will do pictures another day." I look at you in amazement that you are such an amazing kid. You have such a sense of self. You are a strong willed, independent girl who still loves to cuddle with mom and dad. I pray that will last a bit longer! I love you my baby girl. I am so proud of who you are. I hope you are having a great time at camp. I hope you tell us stories of what you did while you were there. You may be growing up each and every day, but you will always be my baby!

Being okay with me....

I have taken a little time this week to do a little bit of soul searching. I am a person who sometimes lacks the confidence that I try to always portray. This past week I have been thinking about the choices I have made in life and where I am because of those. I have come to a conclusion. I love who I am. I am "mommy". That title is one that I am extraordinarily proud of holding. As of the end of July, it will be 4 years since I decided to stay home and raise our children. It was the most selfless decision I think I ever made, yet also the most selfish. I get to get up each day with my children. I get to be there for the good times and bad. I get to see the smiles in the morning and the meltdowns at nap time. If you had asked me when I was graduating college what I would be doing now, I don't know if I would answer being a mom. Yet, I am SO proud to call myself a mom. I came to this conclusion this past week after realizing that I would not be able to hang out with our friends for a long time at a birthday celebration. At first I was really bummed. Critter will not take a bottle. That is not an understatement. He will scream until he is red and completely sweaty when one is put into his mouth. Sometimes I get frustrated about how I can not leave the house without him for long periods of time. Then I thought about how my son needs me. I am his ONLY source of nutrition at the moment. That is not going to last for much longer. Those who know me and love me for who I am hopefully understand this. I came home last night after being able to go out for just a little bit and got to see the HUGE smile on Critter's face. All he knows from me is love and nurturing. I got to give Pumpkin a good night kiss and hug. These kids of mine are growing like weeds. Each day they each learn something new. They each grow a little more each day. Soon enough Pumpkin will be in school and gone from me for a few hours a week. Before I know it, I will be able to start on a new path for myself. For now, I am beyond content to say that I am a stay at home mom. My children are my life. That does not say I don't exist without them. Yet, I live my life to make them proud to call me their mom.

I think this was all a really important realization for me at this point in my life. I can not really remember what it is like to work outside the house full time. I can not really imagine what I will do once both kids are in school and I have quite a bit of time on my hands. I am really in the middle of those times. I am happy to be a mommy. I am happy to be me. Through the frustrating moments of parenting I need to remember this. My children learn through my actions, words and emotions. I want them to know that I happily made this choice for them and myself. I believe that it is truly important to accept and honor the place we are in life. If we can not do that, then maybe some changes need to be made. I am thankful each day for the sacrifices Hubby made almost 4 years ago so I could go down this ever changing road. I hope and pray that my loved ones can feel the same joy from their lives as I get to. I am mom and I am proud! :)

The munchkins that made me who I am today!
I love how they love each other! He looks at her with such love and admiration...
Those eyes melt my heart each day!
Pure joyous smile due to bubbles. The joy in life should always be found from such simple things...

MIA

I have been a little MIA for the past week. One of my dearest friends from childhood was visiting last week with her family. We have not seen each other since her son was 2 months old. Her hubby happened to have a work conference in Scottsdale, so they flew out from the East Coast and spent the week with us. It was so wonderful to hang out together again. We have been friends since we were 2, so lots of memories and blackmail stories! :) We fit in quite a bit during their time here. We went to the Railroad Park, to a local airport for a tour, up to their hotel to swim and hang out, to a local park splash pad, out to dinner, and I know I am missing some stuff. Pumpkin adored her son. It was really adorable how she attached herself to him. You never can predict a 3 1/2 year old and an 18 month old! We have been friends for so long that it is nice when we can actually hang out together, it is like there was never a seperation. We will most likely see them next summer when our clan goes out to the East Coast, but probably not before then. We have found our rhythm back here, with the exception of Pumpkin asking where her friend is. It is hard to explain distance to a preschooler! It was such a wonderful week last week, I will be cherishing those memories for quite a long time!

Us with our kids. We traditionally take a picture of the two of us sitting on a couch, since that is what we did as kids. Now, there are jsut more of us!

Riding the train at the park. SO cute together!

My show-off at the splash pad. She was really giving her all in showmanship while they were here. She does love to be the center of attention :)

I had to include this one. We got Critter a new bathtub yesterday. It is a big ducky. I wanted to include some of those pictures, but they were not quite decent enough! Hubby actually took this one. I just love Critter's expression, he does think we are a little bit crazy with the camera. He will get used to it!

Family time

This is a little delayed, but we had a great Mother's Day around here. Hubby tried to give me a few hours to go and get a new book and then sit and enjoy it with a cup of coffee, but Critter did not quite like that idea. So, I have a day coming for myself...sometime in the future! That evening, we went to a baseball game. Now, this brought back major memories of my childhood. We would always go to a baseball game or amusement park for Mother's Day, yet my mom did not really enjoy either of these activities. I do like baseball games, especially when we sat in the grass. We brought a blanket. Pumpkin got to run around and play with other kids. Critter laid on the blanket and watched the trees blow and the stars come out. It was a gorgeous night. Our team won, and it was just nice relaxing family time. What more could I ask for. We are going to remember the grass seats for next year, the college season is pretty much over for now. I am looking forward to my time in the bookstore and coffee shop, whenever that happens. It will be like I have two Mother's Days, I'd say I'm a pretty lucky gal! :)

Happy Day

Happy Mother's Day to all the women out there who are positively influencing children's lives. You are a blessing to the title "Mother". The world is blessed by you. I hope that you enjoy your day.

Thank you to my little ones who let me call myself Mother. You bless my life each day. Some days you each make it a little bit mroe difficult to see the joy, but that is a part of this journey called Motherhood. I could not imagine my life any other way than staying home and raising the two of you. I look into your eyes and see love, hope and the future. Thank you for blessing my with this amazing life. I love you both.

Five Months

Five months have gone by since Critter was born. It has been an incredible road so far. To say life is not boring in this home is an understatement. I had a conversation with a good friend yesterday about our children. We talked about how blessed we both feel that our kids get along so well. Pumpkin adored her brother from the first moment she met him. I am an only child. I have seen wonderful sibling relationships many times. I never fully understood until now. Critter lights up when he sees Pumpkin. She can make him laugh like no one else. She gets joy in the smallest things that he does. We went swimming with my mom on Monday, it was Critter's first time. Pumpkin was so attentive to him. She wanted him to watch her swim and wanted to swim with him. They was the two of them interact melts my heart on a daily basis. I could not ask for more. I know they will have their moments in life. I have just treasured the first five months and can not imagine what the future holds. Happy 5 months my big boy. You and your sister make my heart full of love everyday. I love you....

Yes, Critter is under all of that. He is fair skinned like me, gotta protect it! He had so much fun kicking his legs in the water. I think he will be like his sister and just adore being in the pool!

Man to be a kid again. She was finding joy in the smallest things. I think we can all learn that great lesson from kids!

My "little" man!

Clowning Around

What better thing to do after a Carnival themed birthday party than clown around. We had a busy day shopping and partying....but still all smiles around here! Hope you are enjoying your weekend.

What better way to look at a clown nose than cross your eyes at it! :)

Critter would not put the nose on for Hubby or myself, but with Pumpkin he thought it was hilarious! Gotta love the brothers and sisters :)